Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Sammy Sosa Responds to My Request for a Statement

So this is what Sammy says about his suddenly white complexion (from the Associated Press):

"Sammy Sosa says a cosmetic cream he uses to soften his skin is the reason for his lighter skin tone.

The former Chicago Cubs slugger was photographed at the Latin Grammy awards in Las Vegas last week with a noticeably whiter face.

Sosa says he has been using the cream for a long time, and combined with bright TV lights, it made his face look whiter than it really is. Sosa says he is not trying to look like late pop star Michael Jackson and is not suffering from any skin illness.

Sosa made his remarks on the Univision Spanish network. He declined to identify the cream.

Sosa, who turns 41 on Thursday, hit 609 homers over 18 seasons in the majors with the Cubs, White Sox, Rangers and Orioles. He hasn't appeared in a big league game since 2007. "

Yeah. I'm not sure I buy this explanation. Let's look at the evidence again:



You will note that his skin is lightened all over his head - his ears (even the inside), his scalp (right past the hairline), his eyelids and his neck. I bet his sinuses are whiter. Is this the way men, or even women for that matter, use "cosmetic cream" to "soften" their skin? What dude cares about how soft his skin is in the first place? Ladies, when you moisturize do you rub the stuff into your ears and eyelids? I'm thinking no.

Also, if you were using a cream, all over your entire head, and your skin turned THIS pale (he is a black man, remember), wouldn't you freak the fuck out and stop using it? And how bright were those lights? Did the white people just disappear?

Sorry, Sammy, I'm not buyin' it.



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